57. The Certainty of Uncertainty

Right now if you are in a space in your life, where you don't feel like you can move forward that you don't feel like you have the tools to make a change in your life, up level the standards for yourself. Hi, I'm Jay, a certified life coach and former educator who believes that rediscovering ourselves takes just a little bit of courage. This show is focused on helping you develop the mindset and the courage to regain your confidence to redefine yourself and to reimagine your life one episode at a time. Well, hello, my positivity posse. And wherever you are, whatever you're doing, thanks for being here today, Episode 57. The certainty of uncertainty. And you're probably thinking, what the heck does that even mean the certainty of an certainty? Well, if you happen to google it, you're going to find a lot. I mean, a lot of articles around the uncertainty of scientific methods and measures in and questioning yourself and do redoing labs and tests, etc. The certainty of uncertainty. And don't worry, that's not what we're going to get into today. I haven't totally switched the focus of this podcast. But today's episode is really talking about one thing that we know to be true, is that uncertainty is certain. So what do I mean by that? What I mean is that when we're uncertain, and when we're unsure of ourselves, we're certain about it, we're certain that perhaps we're not worthy enough to do something different with our lives, perhaps we're not valuable enough to go for a different job, perhaps we're not worthy enough to be in that relationship we think we should be in or that we want to be in, that were that somehow some way that we're uncertain of even how to move forward. So yesterday on my weekly newsletter, do my, my subscribers, I did a rift off of this just a little bit. And by the way, if you want to sign up for my my weekly newsletter, it's just one of those things where it's like a quick hit every Friday, it's, you know, I have so many thoughts to share, and just so little time, what are you waiting for, to kind of hop on, if you're listening to the podcast, you might as well hop onto the newsletter. So Jason ramsden.com, forward slash newsletter sign up there, you'll get it, you'll get the weekly inspiration, the really good stuff, the things that just pop into my head. And sometimes those things end up ripping off and becoming a full episode of a podcast. So you'll get it both ways, but not always. So pop over there and hop on the hop on the newsletter when you get a chance. But what I said to my subscribers yesterday was this lesson. The thing about uncertainty, my friends, is it doesn't have to be fear inducing. Like really, it doesn't even have to be filled with worry and doubt like that's just plain and simple. It doesn't have to be it is it always is because of the thoughts that are in our heads. So if you ever find yourself uncertain about anything, like pick a topic, it doesn't really matter what the topic is. Uncertainty is kind of one of those things that everybody has, we look at something and we're not sure if we're qualified enough or good enough, or strong enough, or whatever it may be like you pick it, you pick it, whatever it may be, it brings up these fears in us and those fears can who knows where those come from right deep seated down below, in our Inner Inner of innards that go way back in time to probably childhood. I don't, I don't really concern myself about the past, right. For me, especially as a coach, everything I do is forward facing. And I want you to think of it that way too. So when we're talking about the certainty of uncertainty, here are three things that I that I put out in my newsletter that I think would be a benefit for you. So that's why I'm sharing them here. So let's talk about them for a little bit. Number one, number one on the list, release the reins. Release the reins. And what I mean by that is control what you control, like only worry about what you can control in your life like let go, let go and move on to the things that you can't control. If there are things that you're uncertain about, and you can't control it, you need to let go. Like that's that will be something that you can do that that'll go a long way towards removing the uncertainty in your life. I had a really good conversation last September here on the show with Laura Tierney about just that topic control the control the controllable was the topic you can find it it's episode 36. But what it comes down to for me like them release the reins like imagine that you're trying to break a horse. So if you've seen a Western show if you've you've watched anything that's out there Yellowstone is a big show right now, right with Kevin Costner. There's 1883 with Tim McGraw and Sam Elliott and Faith Hill there But those folks are in shows that sometimes they have to break a wild horse or they have to break a steed. And sometimes it just can't be done. And so you need to release the reins and just let go, let go of the horse that you're trying to break, and let them run free because it's just something that you can't have control over. And this comes into play all the time in our lives, right? We worry about things that we can't control. Well, if you can't control it, if you don't have the reins, if you can't break this deed, why do you even bother? What's the so what they're so what? So what if that happens? If it's how do you control and it really doesn't affect you. So what. And I should warn you here now now that you're about five minutes into the episode, it may be a little preachy today, it might be, but I'm really passionate about letting go and moving on. And so many of you so many people get stuck, they just get stuck where they are in their lives, they get paralyzed by fear, they get paralyzed by the uncertainty of what it would mean to take even the tiniest, smallest micro risks in their lives. They're not sure if they can part without thing in their closet that sat there forever. They're not sure if they can put themselves out there for going for a new job. Or making the relationship better with a family member. They're just they don't know. But But listen, if you can control it, awesome. But if you can't release the reins, just release the reins, let it go, let that horse run, let it run wild and free. Number two that I shared was you have to drop hope as a strategy, my friends, hope is a good thing. Okay. Hope is wonderful. We hope for lots of things in our lives. But oftentimes, when we hope for something, it's something out of our control. We're hoping that somebody else will do something. As opposed to hoping that we're going to do something, if we if we can, if we're hoping about something that we can do it, then we do it. Right, this goes back to what we were talking about taking control. Resolve to take control of even the smallest decisions in your life. Don't hope for a better life. Don't hope to lose weight. Don't hope to quit smoking, don't hope to have a better relationship with your your spouse, your partner, your kids, stop hoping and start doing when you put all of your energy into hoping you don't have the energy to actually do the things you need to do to get the stuff done to move you forward in the right direction. So drop hope as a strategy, remove it from your vocabulary, you can say I hope for somebody else, right? Because you don't have any control over that. I hope someone gets better. I hope somebody feels better. I hope somebody else's relationship gets mended. I hope somebody else moves on and has a better career. I hope for someone else awesome. do that all day long day. Like how are you want to do that. That's awesome. Having hope for other people as a miracle. Don't have hope for yourself, have the doing for you. And number three, finally, number three, up level your standards. What does that mean? Up level your standards. Right now, if you are in a space in your life, where you don't feel like you can move forward that you don't feel like you have the tools to make a change in your life, up level the standards for yourself. And here's the truth, your brain, your mind, you are you are so much more capable of doing great things in your life, doing great things for yourself making change in your life, you're more capable of that then you can ever imagine. So don't try and change everything at one time, do the little things do the little steps. But the number one thing is uplevel your standards about yourself. So often we have standards and expectations for everybody else around us. We have standards and expectations for how the person to be driving next to us. We have standards and expectations for how people should treat each other. We have standards and expectations for everything in this world. But you know what we don't have standards and expectations for for ourselves to get better for ourselves to move forward for ourselves to make a change in our life. Those standards and expectations go out the window as soon as they're focused on ourselves. Now, if you're sitting there, and you're saying to yourself, I don't know how to make a change. Well, that's not on this list. But let's get rid of that phrase. I don't know. If somebody asks you, oh, how could you make a change? How could you move forward? You're like, I don't know. You do know. As soon as you say the words, I don't know, you remove all of the curiosity that you have around making a change around doing something different around having a different viewpoint about yourself as soon as you say I don't know. It stops the conversation with yourself. It stops the conversation with somebody else. But if you remove the words, I don't know from your vocabulary, and just say Okay, well imagine if I did no. What would that look like? What would my life look like? What would my relationships look like? How could I take back control of my life if I did no less than friends let, at a bare minimum uncertainty often comes down to whether you could or couldn't do something, whether you can or you can't do something, or whether you will, or you won't do something. If you have uncertainty in your life about anything, decides you could can and well make a change and then get to work doing it. See, I told you how it's gonna be a little preachy today. But it's passionate and maybe it's because I'm talking to myself to write a lot of this podcast is my journey, me and my thoughts out on the table for you to hopefully Garner something from to learn from, but that's where I am today, right? In uncertain times, when there's uncertainty in your life, release the reins. Drop hope as a strategy, and uplevel your standards for yourself. And number four, which wasn't really on the list, but get rid of the phrase? I don't know, because you do. You really do know. Alright, my friends, today was a super short episode probably better for you. Feels good for me. But listen, here's what I want you to do. Go over to Jason Ramsden comm forward slash newsletter, sign up for my weekly newsletter, you'll get lots of little insights every single week. Sometimes they make their way into podcasts, sometimes they don't. But it's a benefit for you. If you're looking to kind of do the whole package the whole enchilada, as they say, take some time, stop the podcast hop on a web browser and go over there and take care of that right now. MPs, the underlying tenant underlying component the underlying little kernel of knowledge thing that happens to be like the foundation of the three things that I mentioned before about being certain in uncertain times like actually going through and doing it is taking responsibility. That's a topic for a different show a different time. But take responsibility realize my friends release the reins drop hope as a strategy up level your standards and get to where all right, my friends. Thank you for being here. And as always, it does really mean the world to me that you listen to this show. Every single week. We're here putting out good content just for you. I do my best. I appreciate your time. And as always be well be happy be you and may your quest for positivity. Begin today. A positivity posse. If you're ready to coach yourself, I invite you to download my free workbook. Seven Steps to regain, redefine and reimagine your life. Head over to www dot Jason ramsden.com backslash my dash links and click on the download link at the top of the page. It's that simple. And hey, if you're interested in working with me as your own personal life coach, visit Jason ramsden.com and click Get Started in the upper right hand corner of the screen. I hope to talk to you soon until then have an amazing day. Positivity on fire is a production of impact one media LLC. All rights reserved.