76. Perfectionism is Procrastination All Dressed Up

Hey, Hey, my I curious friends what's going on in your world today? So I've been thinking a lot about perfectionism lately and what I have come to find is that perfectionism well, it's just really procrastination, all dressed up, you know, , a nice suit, a tie and some Polish shoes, or even in evening gown with pearls, you know, Clothes that you don't necessarily wear, but when you have to get into them, you know, they just don't feel right. And that same goes for your Sunday. Best you spend a lot of time getting ready and all spiffy only to be uncomfortable in what you're wearing for whatever event you're attending. I believe a hundred percent that perfectionism is a lot like this. You spend a lot of time trying to make things in your life. Perfect. And all that does is really delay you from taking action in your life. Think about it. This. Do you ever spend countless hours trying to make a presentation look good only, only to run short on time to focus on the actual content of that presentation. What about worrying about making a perfect meal for the family? All right. Let's say Thanksgiving and you're just not happy with it. So it takes longer or you start again and you just, you know, you run up against the deadline and you don't get some things done. When you spend time trying to make things perfect. You'll almost always end up wasting time , to the detriment of what you're really trying to accomplish. And that is to get things done. So perfectionism is just procrastination, all dressed up. Let me ask you a question. Why does it take you so long to get ready to. You want that perfect look, right? No hair outta place outfit on point you spend time trying to get it all to be perfect. So you don't have to spend as much time at the event , you procrastinate in an effort to make yourself late, so you can get home sooner. And I hear you. I hear you, Jay. Listen, that's not even close. I don't do that. I always get things done. And to that, I would ask you, well, do you get things done, but do you get them done? You just make things happen and not worry about what others think. Probably not. And here's why you and me and all humans at some point have dealt with this cycle. Okay. The perfectionism procrastination paralysis paradox. What is the PPP? Exactly? Well, you have these spinning twirling ever growing to do lists in your. The list in your brain is often so long that you can't even name all the things on the list. You're, you're pulled to get things done. And yet, because the list is so long, you, you panic, you delay and you might even stop doing the most simple of things on that list because the list is just too big. Now, have you ever just said, you know what, screw it. I'm not gonna do it. Maybe it's something as simple as cleaning out your closet, but because you aren't really sure where to start. You're not sure what it would look like in the end, or, you know, maybe you can't even imagine where to begin. So you literally don't even engage in starting the task because you want your closet to be perfect every time you enter it. And that's just something that you haven't done before you haven't seen it before. And then the longer you procrastinate, the more likely you'll have a knock at your door from procrastination's best friend shame. Shame will start to tell you all the ways that your procrastination is. Shame will kind of eat you up and spit you out to the point where you never bother cleaning out that closet. But every time you go into it, you feel shame talking in your ear. It's whispering to you. It's telling you it's not good enough now, listen, I get it. Because as a human happens to me as well, it happens to all of us. Right. I, I procrastinate because I want things to be perfect. Even though deep down. I know there's no such thing as perfectionism. There's no such thing as perfect. Seriously, nothing in this world is perfect. And, and yet you want perfection so badly, you stop taking action in your life. So how do you go about dealing with the perfectionism procrastination paradox? For starters, you have to go with a thought that you can't let perfect be the enemy of good enough. And for the majority of what you do in life. Good enough is. It's good enough. You can do this by focusing on the important things to get done and release yourself from worrying about the urgent things to get done. Okay. Take that presentation. For instance, the important thing to get done is ensuring the content is powerful. The look and feel feels important, but it's, it's just masked as urgent because you think how the presentation looks will captivate. The truth is if you know the content well, it is actually you, that will captivate the people, not the look of the presentation. Trust me, I've given lots of presentations and the most powerful ones are where I connect with the audience. And I do it using the content in my knowledge, not how the slides look and feel and the same holds true for you. It's about you. It's about what you know. So go ahead and release yourself from that high bar of having everything be perfect. Because no one is, is really watching that closely. No one is watching you that closely. All right, next, take those big tasks and chop them up into smaller chunks. You're never going to cut a watermelon in half and then just start eating it with a spoon. Nope, not at all right. You're going to cut it down into bite size chunks. And that is what you're going to do with big tasks. Take that closet. For example, instead of looking at the whole thing as something that needs to be arranged. And when you look at the whole thing, you just say, you know what? I don't have time. I'm just not gonna get into it. No, instead start with just your shirts and call it a day, get those organized. Then come back later and focus on your pants. Whatever else may be, right? Whatever the next type of thing you wanna organize in your closet. And then keep doing that. The smaller chunks until the closet is organized the way you would want it. And then it feels good. Now finally get in the habit of saying no to your. Telling your brain? No. When it wants to drag you into procrastination is an effective way to keep you focused. It works by reminding yourself that you're in control. And your thoughts about procrastination are just that they're just thoughts. You can change your thoughts to be focused on saying yes to getting work done. Yes. To things being good enough and yes, to moving through the small chunk of tasks each day. Now the trick here is to set an intention. Each day and just make it three things, three things you need to accomplish. What are the three most important tasks you need to accomplish? Not the three most urgent tasks you need to deal with, but the three most important tasks you need to accomplish. When you focus on just three tasks of the day, you'll find you'll find that you more readily get them. That you have time to do other things and because you're crossing things off your list and feeling accomplished well, doctor procrastination stays away. Think of it this way. Three things a day keeps the doctor away. All right. Finally, if you are feeling like you're the only one that is dealing with the PPP issue, don't worry. There, there are millions of people on this planet that struggle with procrastination dressed up as perfectionism and, and I'm right there with you. All right. My friends, if you're interested in enjoying the intentionally curious community, share how perfectionism is holding you back. Well, come over to Jason ramston.com/episode 76 and drop a comment. I'll be there to guide you, and it's the best way to feel connected and not alone. So let's chat and get connected. And I look forward to seeing you there also, are you a fan of the show or perhaps even this episode, can you do me a favor and go ahead and click that five star rating on iTunes and write a. The show only grows when awesome listeners like you take the time to rate and review the show. All right. My friends that's it for this week. Remember be willing, be curious and be intentional. And until next week, keep doing the work. You've got this.