Intentionally Curious

82. Doubt is Not an Obstacle

September 24, 2022 Jason Ramsden Episode 82
Intentionally Curious
82. Doubt is Not an Obstacle
Show Notes Transcript

Who’s doubting themselves these days? Are you saying me, me, me, me? 

Doubt pops when you begin to wonder if you are in the right relationship, picked the right career, doing a good job as a parent, or asking yourself if you should leave that organization you’ve been with forever. 

Doubt has a funny way of creeping into your life at the exact moment you don’t want it to because that it’s job. Doubt wants you to check yourself. Doubt wants to keep you safe. And doubt is really good at reminding you of all the other times you wanted to question things in your life and make a change because doubt is the way your brain keeps you safe and doing the comfortable things in your life. 

In this episode, I teach you that doubt isn't a obstacle, how you can recognize it quickly, and then leverage it to empower yourself to get what what you want.

Get after it my friends and we’ll see you next week!

For links to everything mentioned in this episode and more visit:

https://www.jasonramsden.com/episode82

Hey, hey, hey my curious friends. Welcome to episode 82, where I will help you get over those thoughts of doubt that creep into your head. Whenever you wanna make a change in your life, or if fear you can't accomplish your goals, I get it right. We're human beings. And we're gonna bring that doubt with us. We're gonna bring it along the way, even though it creeps in and I'm gonna get to that in a moment. But before I get started with today's topic, I want to ask a favor. If you're a fan of intentionally curious, please go ahead and click that five star rating on iTunes now. And then after the episode, write a review. Intentionally curious, only grows to reach other listeners when awesome human beings, like you take the time to rate and review the show. And when you invite others to become a part of the C. All right. Who's doubting themselves these days. Are you saying me? Me? Me. Me. Me? Yeah. Yeah. Listen, I get it. Those thoughts of doubts, pop up into your head and you begin to wonder if you are in the right relationship. If you pick the right career, , if you're doing a good job as a parent or asking yourself, if you should leave that organization you've been with forever, like doubt has a funny way of creeping into our lives at the exact moment. You don't want it. because that's doubt's job. I doubt wants you to check yourself. That's all doubt is right. Doubt wants to keep you safe. And doubt is really good at reminding you of all the other times. You wanted to question things in your life and make a change because doubt is the way your brain keeps you safe. Doubt is what keeps you doing the comfortable things in your life. So how is doubt? Not an obstacle. So it's true. All right. That doubt has killed more dreams than failure ever has in people's lives. And, and let me stress that, right. Let me stress this and doubt. Doesn't have to win. Doubt doesn't have to be this incredibly large obstacle standing in the way of what you want most out of your life. And the key is there's one thing you have to do first use doubt as the key to unlock your potential, right? We're not gonna shun doubt. We're not gonna put it to the side. It's part of, of what we have in our lives as human beings, but we're gonna use it to unlock our potential.. We're gonna bring it along for the ride, right? Doubt's an important check and balance in our lives and we can leverage it. We can leverage doubt. So here's an example. Let's say you want to have a better relationship with food, but when you start diet number, I don't know, 20 of your life, the doubt pops up, right? The doubt comes up and says, well, you know what? You haven't been able to do the other 19 diets. So why is number 20 gonna be any different? What's gonna make 20 B the one that's a success. And then what happens? You don't even try diet 20. And instead you grab that bag of chips or Oreos or ice cream, and you pop yourself on the couch and you turn on Netflix because that feels better to you in that moment. It feels better than trying to push back against doubt. So here's the thing you're teaching your brain, something very important here. Right? So when doubt pops in. you teach your brain. Well, you know what? I can't do it. So I even bother. So you don't try again. You don't change your relationship with food. You don't try new things and you continue to be in an unhealthy relationship with yourself. Listen, I get it. Making change in your life is not something where you just flip a switch and it's done. Like, there is no proof. There is no magic. There is no oh, it's done. And now I have an entirely new way of eating and you're healthy. And, and in the weight in that you wanna be in and your relationship with food is good, right? That's not how it works, but what can you learn from doubt and failure from your previous 19 attempts? Here's what I can offer to you. Based on my work with my clients, you can learn from doubt that it's just a feeling doubt is just a feeling brought on by the thought that you can't do it. So in this case, right, in this case, To have a better diet lose weight. You can apply this to any aspect in your life. It's not just not about losing weight. You can apply this idea of leveraging doubt as the way to show you the way to help you make improvements in your life. Think about this for a moment. What does doubt feel like to you? Have you ever give, given any thought to the exact way, doubt feels in your body? Okay, where does it live? Where does doubt live as a feeling? Does it live in your chest, maybe in your shoulders, maybe in your face. And what does it feel like when it comes up? When Dow comes up, is it hot? Is it tingly? Is it a hollowness or maybe it feels like pins and needles all over. However doubt manifests itself in your body as a feeling is the key to not having doubt be an obstacle in your life when you are able to properly. Describe how doubt actually feels in your body. Like stop for a moment and say, Ooh, it feels. Overwhelming in my chest. It feels heavy in my chest, you know, whatever it may be. But when you can actually describe how it feels, if you could use adjectives here and not other emotions to describe how doubt feels, you can only spend 90 seconds, right. To feel the feeling. That's all it takes to feel a feeling 90 seconds. And it takes for you. It. A little bit, right. For you to feel the doubt 90 seconds and you can acknowledge it and move past it. And then you can begin to generate more positive thoughts. I know it's crazy, it's like, how can doubt be something that I can just leverage? Well, when you feel your feelings and you could do that with anything, not just doubt any feeling that you have any negative feeling you have, you can use this technique where you just feel where it feels in your body. You take the 90 seconds and you recognize. And then, you know, when it's coming on, how to deal with it in the future. So whenever you say yourself, I can't do it. I don't know how to do it. That's fear speaking for you and fear is a cover up and a cop out. Okay. And that's okay. Right. We get scared. I get it. I get it. And again, we're gonna leverage that too. So in that moment, before a doubt can creep in before fear can take, hold, ask yourself, how does the thought I'm having right now serve me well in this moment. Then ask yourself, what is a better thought? What is a better thought I can use to replace? I can't do it. That thought might be as simple as I can do it. Damn it. I can do it. Or I'm strong. I'm strong, I'm capable and I can do hard things. Well, do whatever the thought is. Think about the emotion that comes up for you. When you say I can do it like total switch, right? Maybe the emotion is powerful. Maybe you feel confident or empower. Then take a, take a moment to describe what that feeling feels like and feel it all the way through, leverage it, use it, and then propel yourself forward to try and make the change in your life that you desire. Listen, doubt. Shouldn't be an obstacle in your life. It's okay to have doubt. Listen to me when I say that it's okay to have doubt. We all have it right. We're human beings, but it shouldn't be an obstacle. Instead doubt should be the stepping stool for you to reach something higher. Use it, use doubt, use doubt to step up, use it, to see that you're capable of doing hard things. Well, use it to, to show yourself that you can achieve whatever you put your mind to in reaching your goals. Will you fail sometimes apps, a fricking absolutely. You'll fail and that's okay. We learn by failing. If we never take a chance, we don't fail. So we don't know how to learn from it. So take the opportunity to learn and fail. All right. When you do, you will learn from the failure and you'll leverage it. You'll leverage it to step up again and again and again and make it the next game. The next win. The next level. My friend's doubt is only an obstacle in your life when you allow it to be an. So stop allowing doubt to consume your life and your thinking again, we're not gonna put it to the side. We want doubt in our lives, cuz it's a check and a balance for us, but make it work for you. Make doubt, work for you so you can become the best version of yourself. I believe in you, my friends, and I know you can accomplish anything. If you trust in yourself. Now, if you have trouble trusting in yourself or believing in your ability to do anything, I'm here for you. That's my job. As a life coach, I'm here for you. So reach out to me at coaching@jasonramsden.com and let's connect. I know I can help you so reach out if you want help. In the meantime, though, if you wanna share one goal you have in your life right now that you are doubting, you can achieve. Go over to jasonramsden.com/episode 82 and drop in the comments, what it is. And I'll personally respond to your comments to provide support on your journey, to having a better relationship with yourself. Let me be your accountability partner. All right. My friends, that's a wrap on this week's episode and always remember, be willing, be curious and be intentional. And until next week, keep doing the work you've got this.